We hear it all over downtown. That incessant honking from
cabbies and cars leave people wondering, “Seriously, what the hell are you
honking about?!” Whether you’re a driver
getting honked at, a driver doing all the honking, or the passer-by on the
street, really what the hell are you honking about?
Well, it comes to no surprise that SAAB, a Swedish car
company, has come up with the idea of the Decipherable Car Horn. Say goodbye to
the confusing, singular, urgent sound of regular car horns. The new SAAB horn
has a variety of phrases that let you know what drivers are actually honking about.
Some phrases include,
“Dude, can you just move up a little so I can turn right?”
“Why are you pausing at the yellow!!??”
“Turn left already! There are no pedestrians!”
“You can’t turn left during rush hour here, man, c’mon!”
“I fucking love cookies!”
“Not another Mylie Cyrus song on the radio!”
“Get out of the fucking way! There’s an ambulance behind
you!”
“Stop honking at me!”
“Sorry, I honked the wrong phrase at you!”
“Nice U-turn!”
“Why you gotta block the intersection like that?!”
“I’m late for work!”
“Are you Asian?”
“Are you female?”
“Are you an Asian female?”
Studies have shown driver frustration grows when honking
goes unexplained. Thanks to the new Decipherable Car Horn by SAAB, people can
better understand what kind of driver they are being on the road. With SAAB’s
tagline Welcome to the State of Independence, drivers can better accurately
communicate their frustrations on roads filled with fucking idiots. Freedom of
speech, man. Now get out of the way.
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